Thursday 24 January 2008

Here is your letter/ with everything I know

My friend pierced her lip and now we're in a fight.

She went out for no reason other that she felt like it at that moment and then decided to put a big ring through the middle of her lip. No thought, nothing.

So, the fact that I thing lip piercings are ugly aside, they aren't the best piercing to get. It creates a constantly open pathway to the mouth, I nice warm, wet place for bacteria to hang out. They kind of love it there. And lip piercings are complementary to this.

But it's not about the lip piercing. Not really. She just moved out of her dad's house and into an apartment with two friends. Her old house was not really the best place for her to be -- her dad had no authority over her anyway and he was a pretty toxic guy to have around. Mostly they kept to themselves though. But now she is living in an appartment with two friends. Even before we moved out, she had some habits I didn't approve of. Staying up all night many nights in a row just because, not getting work done until the last second, going out late at night... Everything has just been exacerbated by moving out. She has people over every night, including her DJ boyfriend who can sleep all day since he makes his own schedule as a musician for a living, but she has school. She only comes to class to hand things in, but she never comes otherwise. She stays up all night or sleeps for a couple hours a night. And I'm worried about her. She's never had that authority figure in her life to teach her some things. I am all for spontenaity. I wish I could be more spontaneous. But doing what you feel like doing whenever you feel like doing it isn't necessairily the best thing always. Sometimes you have to do things you don't like. Be responsible.

Which comes back to the lip ring. She's mad because I was less than supportive when I heard, and instead asked her if she had thought about this, considered the risks, the whole gateway-for-bacteria situation and you know, if she'd like it tomorrow. I just want her to take a bit more reponsibility for herself. I'm worried about her if she can't do that.

The thing is, I'm her only friend who pulls the responsibility card on her. Not that they're irresponsible - not true. My friend isn't even that irresponsible. It's just that when I suggest responsibility, she gets angry with me. She thinks I'm being a bitch, or a bad friend. Really, I'm just at my wits' end. I know we're growing apart, but I want to stay friends with her. I'm just a little afraid for her.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I totally understand what you're going through. Okay, not really, but when it comes to losing a friend, you know I know exactly what it feels like.

So I love you to death and things with her will work out. She's a smart girl, and deep down must know that you're just trying to help.

ily.