I'm in Ottawa. This is me and my sister. We know how to have a good time.
Today I had a weird experience. It involved the above picture.
Last night I slept over at a friend's house. We've drifted a bit in the past few years, for some reason; different high schools, different friends, and she became closer with my little sister. We had a girls' sleepover night yesterday and had a grand ole' time. Emma has a new camera that is several different kinds of awesome and we took pictures. Today, in true teen style, I looked at them on Facebook and was suprised by what I saw.
Backstory: This year, I managed to do a reverse Freshman Fifteen. I don't snack between meals (except for Garlic fingers at 1 am... but that barely counts). The food in the caf doesn't exactly make me want to fill up. I sort of thought maybe I had lost weight, but I wasn't sure. I became sure when I took off my shirt (to change) one day, and Davis was there, and she said something like "wow! You're thin!". But still - I have skinny friends. I make a point not to weigh myself, so I have no idea what exactly I weigh, and what does it matter anyway? It doesn't. But I sort of wonder. All I know is I needed to buy new jeans at Christmas and my prom dress doesn't fit anymore.
Today I looked at the picture of my sister and I and turned to my mother. "Oh my gosh, look how small my arm looks!" I said to her. There was a brief pause as I realized that that's how big my arm actually looks. And we both realized just how skewed my perception of my own body is.
I feel a little like Kate Winslet; I still think I'm the fat girl. Even though... maybe I'm not.
This is going to take some getting used to.