Wednesday, 27 February 2008

They say we have to learn to compromise/ stay inside our means and we'll all be fine

Hell week is going much slower than I had feared, but way faster than I'd hoped. Strange, I know, but perhaps there is a grain of truth in that statement. No? Didn't think so.

I accomplish many many things every day at school. I go to class, I go to lunch meetings, I call bus companies, I type permission forms, I apply to universities, I request transcripts, I talk to teachers, I run meetings, sometimes I do homework... but at the end of every day, I'm exhausted and there are still a million things left. Once you get to the middle of a week like that, it's really hard not to give up altogether. I really can't afford to give up, since most of my deadlines are about applying to university... Can't miss that. At the same time the whole thinking about university thing is giving me the heebie jeebies, so I will not think about that right now and instead mechanically write soulless responses about how my experiences with Insight Theatre affected my philosphies on teaching and how I want to use the knowledge I'd gain in Communications Studies. Yuck-o. One high point to these afternoons is passing by other very busy friends, walking to the bus stop with John Wishart ("It's laundry day... so I had to improvise an outfit), chatting with Andrea when really, we both should be working (who wants to work anyway...).

Improv has become the huge task tacked onto the end of my day. I never get enough sleep*, so by the time improv practice rolls around after 3, I am exhausted, drained physically and emotionally, and I have a splitting headache. Not the best feeling for creativity. Improv is also stressing me out SO much, because I feel so unprepared... but I want to do well. K keeps telling us that we're doing so well, we know what we're doing, etc, but I don't feel prepared. She says we all just get it, and it's easy for us, and maybe that's true, but still... I'm nervous. Mostly because I leave next Thursday for Europe on a school trip and don't get home until three days before competition, which is only 2 days after March Break ends.

Amid all the stress, there comes a beacon of excitement: In 8 days, I will be in Paris. Ok, with the flying it'll be 9, but still. I love Paris. It is my favourite city I've ever been in. I have a secret dream to study/live in Paris for a year. I love the language, the culture, the metro, the history, the art, the smell, the feeling... Paris is, in a word, breathtaking, and I'm so excited to go on this trip.

Also on the trip, we're visiting Avignon in Provence, and then Barcelona in Spain. It's a whirlwind trip, so it'll be fast, but I think it'll be great. I'm only worried because I know almost no one on the trip at all, I'm rooming with two girls I only kind of know, and I'm on a plane of 12 students (the other group is like, 45) with no one I know well. My hope is that we all bond on the plane ride over and everyone is friendly and great and who the fuck cares anyway because I'm in Europe and I feel like the luckiest girl in the world.

Now, if the luck would only stretch to improv regionals...

*Like, right now, it's 11:00 already. How did that happen?


Lorien said...

You don't need luck, m'dear, for improv. You guys are already hilarious. <3

Milan said...

Paris is a delightful city. I hope your visit is full of excellent cheese and wine, and relatively devoid of strikes and sudden thunderstorms.

La Canadienne said...

Well, since this is unfortunately a school trip, all fabulous french wine is completely off-limits. Which is really annoying. Pah.